except, i am
kind of homeless
for the next year.
i was thinking about it the other day. and i haven't actually lived in
a place i call home
for almost two years. a few weeks here and there when we have Christmas break and things, but even then, my pennsylvania home no longer feels like....a permanent home. it's that
childhood memory home
that i visit every once and while.
i never thought that would happen. i guess i just always thought it would feel the same forever and ever....but then you grow up and move out and realize that you're
waiting for a new home.
what does home really mean?
i know right now i have a dorm room (which i've made feel like "mine" as much as possible), but
it's not the same.
i miss having a kitchen, a bed that's truly mine, a bathroom that has a real home-like toilet, a living room to sit with my loved ones and watch movies, a patio to relax on at night. a
place to cultivate authentic love and family
and space to grow and a happiness, a comfort that has
in only a year,
i'll have my home again.
a real, tangible, permanent home. that's so crazy to think about--and even crazier to realize that
it will be with eric. it will be ours.
but it makes sense, really. because that's where i feel
the most at home
anyway. with him. that's what makes it. no matter where that is, it always feels like
i've come home.
i am going to be quite a happy girl.