my problem with proposals

as i'm sure most of you know by now, i'm a sucker for romance, especially weddings. and what comes before the wedding? the proposal. 

+
[disclaimer: this is a post written from my own perspective and opinion--i am not making any factual claims or conclusions and will not disregard anyone else's opinion about the topic.]

proposals used to be the sort of thing i loved. however recently, i found a problem with them. i've noticed that proposals have become a sort of attention-seeking endeavor, one susceptible to the influences and effects of media. 
don't get me wrong--i love those flash mob, lip-syncing youtube videos just as much as the next girl. but as much as i love them, they make me question, why do proposals have to be a worldwide show?

i've always imagined a proposal as a private, intimate moment of pure love between two people. lately, it feels like proposals have become a competition of whose is bigger, better and more over the top. gone is the private moment between two soul mates as they realize they will be spending forever together--replaced by a show that will soon be aired all over youtube, as if the love doesn't exist unless it gets millions of views. 

maybe i'm overreacting. but it seems to me this new kind of proposal has become an intimidating and overwhelming standard that men across the country are subconsciously being held to. thousands of women hope and wish, as they watch the neatly executed, dramatic displays of affection all over youtube, that their man will be that thoughtful, that declarative, that confident and incredible. it has become the standard for everyone, a standard almost impossible (and quite frankly, unnecessary) to live up to.
there shouldn't be a standard....right? 

that's how i feel at least. there shouldn't be a standard for proposals because they are designed to be a unique and personal. they should be tailored to each woman, to each couple--not tailored (selfishly...) to the media and its ever-loyal watchers. what started out as something totally awesome and one-of-a-kind has developed into various replicated versions of something originally sincere. something that was originally rooted in a unique, individual love. 

why do we as women only feel special when it's on display for the world? how does that make a proposal better or more sincere? 
a proposal to me should be something beautiful and precious, something that comes from the heart. i have no doubt that the men who create these extravagant proposals dearly love their women. i just think that we've lost a bit of our perception of sincerity. and what love really means. 

a man who proposes to you with true words and a bouquet of flowers has a love no less in size or strength as the man who proposes to you with a flash mob and your entire family present on a big screen. neither of these is for everyone--that's the beauty of love. everyone's is different, expressed in unique ways. 
maybe we've just forgotten this. 

xo,
kristyn