a letter to my mamma

dear mamma, 

no, it's not your birthday. it's not a special holiday or a remembered date from years past. but today i would really like to tell you

how much you really mean to me.

of course, you already know this. but

i'm so lucky

to have you as a mother. you have been there for me every step of the way, when i really needed it, and even when i thought i didn't. from day one,

you have nurtured me

and watched me grow and been

my biggest cheerleader,

even when you didn't understand some of the things i did (like hiding from the photographer at dance recitals or not playing chicken limbo at my birthday party--to be honest, i don't know why i did those things, either). 

these past few months have been

a big step

in our relationship. if only because i'm so far away from you now. i don't think i realized how hard this transition would be...my transition from a child to an adult. my transition into the next big chapter of my life, one where i will be graduating from college in a year and starting my career and living in a new home away from my old home. 

but i just wanted you to know. t

hat nothing will ever change the bond we have.

i can't even begin to tell you how much

i miss "our days."

when i was very little in the summers and you would tuck me in at night and wake me up in the morning, that

made all the difference

in my day. or when i got a bit older and would come home crying from school (because let's face it, girls are mean) and w

e would talk

at the kitchen table while you cooked dinner. driving in the car with you was

my favorite thing,

when we would belt out michael buble songs with the windows down and just have girl time. i miss snuggling on the couch watching our

ridiculous reality tv shows,

and taking walks in the neighborhood. 

i'm

so blessed and so thankful

that you chose to be a stay-at-home mom while i was growing up.

the memories we created and the lesson i learned will stay with me forever. 

if it weren't for you, i wouldn't have been so inspired by the daily miracles God brings to our lives, like sunsets and snowfalls and pretty flowers. i wouldn't have learned

kindness

and laughter, joy and

love

. i have witnessed true friendship, selflessness and faith

through your example,

as well as how to let go sometimes and just have fun. you have taught me to never give up and always chase my dreams,

no matter what

anyone says.

if it weren't for you, mamma, i wouldn't be who i am today.

so thank you.

for everything you did, for everything you do, and for

everything you are.

your job is the most important one in the world and you have done wonderfully. what you have done for me and given me is

worth more than anything in the world;

it's a gift and a blessing. it's invaluable and eternal. 

i just hope that

one day

i can be half the mother to my own as you are to me. i hope that i will

share the same bond

with my own children someday, because without your love, guidance and friendship,

i would not be where i am today.

it's all because of you, mamma. you amaze me every day.

love forever, 

your daughter

kristyn